Promise Keeper

Today is a special day for our family, it's the birthday of our sweet baby Kate.  And, that perfect, precious girl will always be a reminder of how God keeps His promises, how He creates perfection, and how He covers and protects those who rely on His Word.

As I sat down in the rocking chair in the room where I have rocked Kate since the day I brought her home from the hospital, I was overwhelmed with thankfulness.  I began to think about the love of our heavenly Father and His precious Son, Jesus.  Any good earthly father desires to lavish their love upon their children and one way they do this is by always keeping their promises, doing exactly what they have said they will do. Our heavenly Father is the same way - He desires for us to listen to Him, to get to know His promises, rely on His Words, and then watch Him finish His plan with perfection.

This morning, I thank my heavenly Father for the promise of baby Kate.  Early in the pregnancy, the enemy made an attempt to steal our peace through negative reports from the doctor.  Then, on the day she was born, our baby Kate was born in a way that could have been risky to her survival.  BUT....neither one of these threats from the enemy harmed our baby girl.  Why? Because we (her parents) and her Jesus trusting family and close friends, used our authority (through the name of Jesus) to send the enemy running. God told us Kate would be perfect and we trusted in that Word all the way through.  Since that October 21st, 2013 day, I have NEVER doubted God's Word and what He will do when we trust in Him.

So...this morning I also thank God for the perfection of baby Hannah.  As I still sit in my ever so loved and used rocking chair, I look forward to the quickly approaching day where I get to look into baby Hannah's precious eyes and touch her tiny body parts that I know God is completing right now.  This baby girl had God's Word spoken about her BEFORE we knew she was in my womb. Landis received a timely phone call from a precious friend of ours just minutes before we took a positive pregnancy test. This friend of his knew we were expecting a third baby even before we knew it.  As we confirmed to him that, yes, our pregnancy test was positive, this friend began to tell us all about the promises God had for this baby girl. He told us about the joyful person she would be, how she would be bold for Jesus among a generation who would toss out "religion" and would instead KNOW Jesus.  This friend went on to claim that my pregnancy would be complication free and joyful.

Well, I sit here confirming that this friend was exactly right.  I cannot believe how smooth this pregnancy has gone. I have a little over 7 weeks left and I feel great! The doctor's say "I'm elderly" in pregnancy years but I don't feel any older than I did when I was pregnant with Luke. Thank you Jesus for upholding this body!!! I look forward to the December day that God fulfills the other part of His promise and delivers us with a sweet and perfect JOYFUL baby Hannah.

Luke and I are reading through Genesis together each night and every time we read, Luke and I talk about how time after time in that first book of the Bible, God spoke and what He spoke happened.  It is such a blessing to then be able to show Luke how God STILL works this way today by reminding Luke of all the promises God has spoken in our lives and then fulfilled.

Friends....God loves you and He has promises for you that He will fulfill as you trust Him!  Have a blessed and beautiful October 21st!

Toddy

The Power of THE Word

As many of you know, around 17 weeks pregnant with our baby Kate, I received a phone call that my genetic screening had returned abnormal and showed an increased risk for our baby to have Down's syndrome.  Landis and I were called to the doctor for an ultrasound where we saw a beautiful film of our perfect baby girl. We trusted God for her perfection throughout the rest of the pregnancy and now today, she's just that - perfect!

Well, here in pregnancy #3, I once again received the same phone call that my genetic testing had come back abnormal for a different (worse) genetic disease. This time, I didn't even cry after hanging up the phone but instead became angry - not at God - He's never the bearer of bad news - but at the Devil. I thought to myself, "Why would the enemy attack with lies AGAIN when he knows he has been defeated already?"

I began to talk to the Lord about this second attack. This time, I knew what God's Will was for this baby. I knew she would be whole and perfect and that God would reveal that to us at the ultrasound.  So my talks with the Lord wasn't about begging or pleading with Him to make this baby perfect. He was already working on that because that's His nature - that's His Will.  I wanted God to strengthen me in whatever way He wanted during this battle. A battle that would ultimately take place in my mind.

And....that's where I think the Lord is taking me with this blog because that's where He began to show me some things. During those 5 days between hearing the negative words from the doctor and yesterday when God's Word was proven true, I had to rely on the Spirit of God for peace but more than anything, I had to hear God's Word (His Truths laid out in the Bible for us) louder than any seeds the doctor planted in my mind.

In this mind battle is where so many people (even Christians) get deceived and let their guard down.

Here's an example of what I mean....because Landis and I had been through this negative "screening" process before, we knew that even after a perfect ultrasound that the doctors would offer us other forms of testing to "prove" that the baby was okay or to find the problem areas.  This time, we knew we would be offered an appointment to Wake Forest for "genetic counseling" and a "high risk ultrasound."  We knew BEFORE we entered the doors of the doctor's office yesterday, BEFORE we saw the ultrasound, that we would deny this extra testing and this is why....

There is NO TRUTH outside of God's Word - NONE.  The first screening was a lie from the Devil so we were not going to give the Devil anymore chances to plant negative seeds (contrary to God's Word) through these extra tests and appointments.  God says in His Word that His Will is a perfect, healthy baby - every time! Does the enemy attack babies in utero? YES! He will steal, kill, and destroy any chance he can get.  But, in this body of mine, the Devil has no authority because Jesus reigns inside of me.  I will not release ANY authority to this horrible enemy but instead trust (with a pure, confident, non-wavering heart) in Jesus to shelter this baby, make her perfect, designed for His purpose in this world.

Tests, news, reports from doctors are often times in direct conflict with what I just shared.  When you hear news from the doctor, it is often negative and speaks a "sentence" over you.  Often times more information is needed and more tests are run and it's a sad process that beats us up in our minds if we let it.  I'm writing this blog today to encourage all of you to get God's Word in your hearts so strong, so loud that anytime in your life that you face a doctor's report, that you will hear God's report louder.  You will know what God's Will is and you will take authority in Jesus and claim your heavenly Father's will over anything a doctor tells you. That takes faith - and I know it's hard.

In my situation, many parents would opt for more testing. They would want to know every detail about this baby inside of them and they may or may not receive more bad news. Some people would say, "But, doesn't it drive you crazy that you could know all this other information and be 100% sure that everything is okay. What would a few more tests - just to make sure - hurt?"  Well, that's where the faith walk comes in.  Yes, sometimes saying NO to all this "information" could be hard because the information would give you facts right then (whether good or bad) - faith requires that you EXPECT what you cannot yet see. You trust in God for the finished product BEFORE you have evidence of that finished work. Faith isn't easy but it ALWAYS results in a blessing.  Psalm 22:4-5 says, "In You our fathers trusted; they trusted, and you delivered them.  To You they cried and were rescued; in You they trusted and were not put to shame."

This verse reminds us that when we put all our trust and faith in God, He WILL RESCUE US!  The scriptures do not teach us to put half our trust in God, while also seeking every worldly confirmation that we can - it says to cry to your heavenly Father and trust Him.

Trusting in God, the authority of Jesus that we have been given, and through the power of the LIVING Word of God is the ONLY way to defeat the enemy both in battles in our mind and in our physical bodies.

How do I know this?  Because I've seen the Word of God come to life over and over in my life, especially since I've had children.  The Word of God and the authority through Jesus in me has now saved all three of my children.  Luke was cured of allergies through the Holy Spirit and Word of God. Kate fought negative doctor's reports during my pregnancy and was born in a position that normally injures babies - she was born perfect without one bruise. And, now, this third baby received a terrible report at 18 weeks but has already proven to be perfect.  These attacks did not come from my Father in heaven, but from the enemy; however, my GOOD, GOOD Father rescued us EVERY time! All because we trusted in Him....and Him alone....

As I was asking God to strengthen me even more in His Word over the last few days, I heard this question in my Spirit, "Why did I leave you with the Word of God?"  I told the Lord, "That seems like such a simple question. You left us your Word so we would know your Will and your Ways."  And God whispered again, "Because my Word has POWER. It's a living Word."  Yes, yes, yes!!!  I began to get excited and knew I had a research mission. I love it when the Holy Spirit gives me "homework" that will grow my roots and foundational beliefs deeper. I began to research in the Bible all the scriptures that tell us that God's Word is living and has power and this is what I found....

Hebrews 4:12 - "For the Word that God speaks is ALIVE and FULL OF POWER, it is sharper than any two-edged sword, penetrating to the dividing line of the soul and spirit, and of joints and marrow (of the deepest parts of our nature), exposing and analyzing the very thoughts and purposes of our heart."

Matthew 4:1-11, Luke 4 - these scriptures teach us about how Jesus defeated the temptations of the Devil. He defeated him by telling the Devil what the scriptures said.  I encourage you to read these scriptures on your own.  Jesus is our example of how to use authority to defeat the enemy. If He used the Word of God as His weapon, so should we.

Jeremiah 23:28-29 - "The prophet who has a dream, let him tell his dream; but he who has My Word, let him speak My Word faithfully.  What has straw in common with wheat (for nourishment) says the Lord?  Is not My Word like fire that consumes all that cannot endure the test? says the Lord, and like a hammer that breaks in pieces the rock (of most stubborn resistance)?

Hebrews 6:5 - "And have felt how good (beautiful, excellent, useful, comforting) the Word of God is and the mighty powers (for performing miracles) of the age and world to come."

1 Peter 1:23-25 - "You have been born again, not from a mortal origin (sperm, seed) but from one that is immortal by the ever LIVING and LASTING Word of God.  For all flesh (mankind) is like grass, and all its glory (honor) like the flower of grass. The grass withers and the flower drops off.  But the Word of the Lord (divine instruction, the Gospel) endures forever. And this Word is the good news which was preached to you."

1 Thessalonians 2:13 - "We also thank God continually for this, that when you received the message of God (which you heard) from us, you welcomed it not as the word of mere men, but as it truly is, the Word of God, which is effectually (able to produce) at work in you who believe (exercising its supernatural POWER in those who adhere to and trust in and RELY on it."  This is one of my favorites - the Word of God always has power but we have to RELY on it to see that power manifest and produce.

I share these scriptures with you for this reason...the next time you hear a doctor give you negative news.  Just remember - those words are DEAD as soon as they are spoken then replace those words with ANY of the LIVING, POWERFUL Words from the divine book of scriptures - the Holy Bible.  I challenge you to memorize verses that speak to you personally so those living Words can rise up in you at times when your Bible is not physically with you.  The Holy Spirit is smart, very smart - when you make deposits of the Word into your Spirit, He will bring them to your remembrance in the perfect timing that you need them. I'm a witness!

And...one last thing that God showed me over the last joyful week...one night at bedtime I was reading Kate the scriptures about Jesus and Peter walking on water.  Kate always enjoys the scriptures but on this particular night, God was speaking to me.  This awesome testimony of Jesus' power can be found in Matthew 14:22-33.  When Peter first starts walking on the water toward Jesus, his faith is strong. While his eyes are focused on Jesus, he is able to maintain that miraculous walk on the water.  Then, in verse 30, it says, "When he (Peter) perceived and felt the strong wind, he was frightened, and as he began to sink, he cried out, Lord, save me!"  When Peter took his eyes off Jesus and allowed the circumstances to affect him, he began to sink.  As I read this I knew what God was telling me.  If I allowed more tests on this precious baby, I was allowing the winds and waves to be felt and my faith would be weakened. God told me loud and clear - keep your eyes on Jesus and this miraculous walk to a whole, perfect baby will be complete!  Oh, thank you Lord! I love it when that Word jumps out at me and speaks right to my heart - it's ALIVE, for sure!

When you continue to read these scriptures in Matthew, verse 32 says, "And when Peter and Jesus got into the boat, the wind ceased."  The presence of Jesus brought calm, brought peace to the raging storm around them.  Yesterday after the ultrasound, we sat down with the doctor. As we expected, she explained our testing options, all the negative things that could still be possible, and then asked us what we planned on doing next.  We very calmly explained to her that we would do nothing else but wait on the Lord to complete His Work in me and the baby.  The doctor looked at me and Landis and said, "You all are so calm. I dreaded this conversation all day but you all have made it easy. Some patients get very emotional and even angry but you had your minds made up already."  Landis and I looked at each other, smiled, and said, "It's the joy of the Lord and when we have God's Word, we can be at peace." We told her that God had created perfection in baby Kate and we trusted that He would do it again with this baby girl.

As I drove home yesterday, I thought about how different the thinking that Landis and I have is compared to the world's thinking. As we sat in that doctor's office, we were walking in the Spirit, not allowing the flesh or emotions to take over. When the doctor was telling us about all the different reactions people have when they hear that negative news, I felt sorry for them because I know that they, too, need the Word of God to comfort them, give them peace, and help them overcome the Devil's lies. Friends, turn to the Word daily - read the Bible, study the scriptures, ask the Holy Spirit to reveal them to you personally. You see God knows what tomorrow holds for you and He will share the perfect scriptures with you at the perfect time if you just get still (shut out the world's noise), listen, and learn from your Creator. Why? Because there's POWER in everything He says....

Love you all,
Toddy

Awakening

Praise Jesus for Easter Sunday!  Oh, what a joyous day it is.  This year in our house we have made some major changes to our past "Easter" celebrations, and, as a result, the Gospel of Jesus and the power of Jesus' resurrection has been revealed to me (and then passed on to my children) in a different way than ever before. 

First of all, let me explain some God spoken changes that we made this year...as a family, we participated in NO easter egg hunts, did not purchase Easter gifts or baskets, and, of course, made sure that our children knew the truth about the Easter bunny. (For a side note, if you don't know the truth about the Easter bunny, you should google it's origin and you will find very disturbing information about how he first represented a pagan celebration of the goddess of dawn.  For this reason and many more, our family will have no part of celebrations of little "g" gods...we know the one and only living, powerful capital "G" God and He's all we need.)  

We read the Word of God in our house often but this year we made sure to read the scriptures from the Bible (Luke - Chapter 23) that describe Jesus' crucifixion.  We also included Ephesians 4:8-9 which tells us what Jesus was doing during the time that His flesh was still in the tomb.  Then, this morning, Kate and I took a sunrise walk.  We played our Jesus songs and watched the sunrise over our neighborhood as we worshiped Jesus - the reason for our celebration on this day.  I look forward to also reading Luke Chapter 24 (the scriptures that tell us about Jesus' resurrection) when Luke wakes up this morning.

Through these changes of focusing on Jesus alone (and trying our best to shut out the world's eggs and bunnies), Jesus revealed this very simple revelation to me (and with the children)....

Did you know that on that first Easter day your identity changed?  Luke 24:36 says this, "Now while they were talking about this (the witnessing of seeing Jesus' alive on the road to Emmaus), Jesus Himself took His stand among them and said to them, 'Peace (freedom from all the distresses that are experienced as the result of sin) be to you!'"

Did you catch that?  Jesus Himself was reminding the disciples and other witnesses that they no longer had to identify with sin and the bondage/stress/guilt that comes with it. Jesus reminded them to identify with peace. On that day (on this day), Jesus' resurrection had defeated sin and replaced it with peace.  And...also on that day (on this day), Jesus' resurrection had defeated death and replaced it with eternal life.  So, praise Jesus - from that day forward, we no longer have to identify with sin, with guilt, with stress, with worry, with doubt - but we only identify with peace, with eternal life, and with the love and thankfulness of what Jesus has done for us.  

On that day of Jesus' resurrection, we became a son/daughter of God.  Our pathway - communication - relationship - with God, the Father, was restored.  All of the blessings of Heaven and the good treasures that God wants to give us became available.  The Kingdom of Heaven had come! And, of course, it's still here.  The Kingdom of Heaven is right here, right now - when we turn our sin over to Jesus and accept Him as our personal savior. 

Today, in churches all over the world, the Gospel of Jesus will be taught.  Today, many people who usually don't go to church will find a church and enter the doors.  I talked to God this morning and prayed that the Holy Spirit would go forth and bring people to Jesus today.  Romans 1:16 says, "For I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ, for it is the power of God to salvation for everyone who believes, for the Jew first and also for the Greek."  

Oh, friends, if you don't know Jesus as your personal savior today, call out to Him. Or, if you know Jesus and you are trusting Him as your savior from sins but you are still identifying with guilt from your past or you are struggling to overcome the temptations of this world, call out to Jesus today. Ask Jesus to reveal His identity to you.  Remember, Romans 8:10 says, "If Christ is IN you, the body is dead because of sin, yet the Spirit is alive because of righteousness."  Jesus has made you righteous in God's eyes (as soon as you accept Him). God doesn't see your dirty past but only your clean Spirit (that is one with Jesus).  So, now, ask God to help you begin to see yourself as He does - pure, clean, righteous. Tell yourself that you are a son/daughter of our loving heavenly Father.  Tell the enemy that those guilty "feelings" and reminders of your past are a LIE.  Don't let your mind identify with those dead things. You are NEW in Jesus and today is the day that represents that first Easter day that changed our identify forever. Oh, thank you Jesus!

This morning, as Kate and I watched the sun rise, we heard the song by Chris Tomlin called, "Awakening."  Some of the words said this..."Like the rising sun that shines from the darkness comes a light, I hear Your voice and this is my awakening."  

Just as the sun rises and overtakes the darkness, Jesus' power in you will overtake sin, stress, worry, and doubt as you let Him.  There is no darkness too powerful for Jesus. God proved that when He raised His Son from the dead...and, now this same power is IN us...Ephesians 1:19-20 says, "His incomparably great power for us who believe, that power is the same as the mighty strength He exerted when He raised Jesus from the dead and seated Him at His right hand in the heavenly realms." 

With God's power in us, we can overcome all evil things in this simple way - identify with Jesus.  

Happy, happy Easter! Happy, happy resurrection day!!! Happy, happy identity changing day!!! Let the awakening (and revelation of our new identify) overwhelm us today and everyday!

Love,
Toddy

New Life

For the last few days, my morning drive to work has slowly become more colorful. With every new touch of color that I see, I smile and feel such a warmth in my Spirit as I think about the new life that spring brings.  Even as I sit here right now (thinking about the pretty purple flowers that began to bloom in my own yard yesterday afternoon), my heart is full of what spring means to me and I pray that the Holy Spirit help me put it into words that will grow your heart as well. 

Maybe the best place to start is winter....think about what happens in winter....the old leaves, the old blooms - they die.  The leaves fall to the ground and then we have to pick them up and get rid of them - our goal is to take these leaves away where we never have to worry about them again. Did you know that is exactly what Jesus did to our sins?  

Jesus bore our sin in His body on the cross. 2 Corinthians 5:21 says, "God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in Him (Jesus) we might become the righteousness of God." Jesus had no sin. His flesh and His Spirit remained pure.  But, God still designed it that Jesus would be beaten and crucified on the cross for our sins. Because of Jesus (and when we identify with Him), we become righteous in the eyes of God. Oh, how God has loved us all along - to put such a perfect plan in place! 

When we are sinners (not born again/haven’t received salvation), we identify with Adam.  We see ourselves as flesh (which is corruptible seed).  We identify with sin and sickness BUT after we are born again and receive Jesus, we identify with Jesus.  Romans 8:10 says "If Christ is in you, though the body is dead because of sin, yet the spirit is alive because of righteousness.

When we are born AGAIN, we are born of Jesus.  Our first birth is a natural one – we are born of the flesh (the likeness of Adam was reproduced).  Our second birth is a spiritual one – we are born of the Spirit (the likeness and power of Jesus was reproduced).  When you are baptized, you go under the water as FLESH, you come out of the water as SPIRIT.  Your identity changes. 

John 3:1-7 says, "Now there was a man of the Pharisees, named Nicodemus, a ruler of the Jews; this man came to Jesus by night and said to Him, 'Rabbi, we know that You have come from God as a teacher, for no one can do these signs that You do unless God is with him.' Jesus answered and said to him, 'Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born again he cannot see the kingdom of God.' Nicodemus said to Him, 'How can a man be born when he is old? He cannot enter a second time into his mother's womb and be born, can he?' Jesus answered, 'Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born of water and the Spirit he cannot enter into the kingdom of God.  That which is born of the flesh is flesh, and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit." 

With Jesus IN us, we see ourselves as Spirit – no longer ruled by the flesh. When we receive Jesus, the flesh dies…it loses its power – the power of the Spirit of Jesus inside of us takes over.  We no longer have to worry about dying (our flesh perishing) because we don’t even identify with that part anymore – we identify with our Spirit – which is eternal.  And…because we identify with the Spirit of Jesus, we know that we are WHOLE. Jesus isn’t sick – He isn’t carrying around feelings of guilt – dread, fear.  Jesus is ALIVE, He’s WHOLE, He’s at peace, and He has authority over all fear through His Power. When we identify with the Spirit of Jesus, we KNOW we have all these things as well and this is where our confidence comes from.  

So....let's get back to those trees and dead leaves.  Remember, that after the leaves die and fall to the ground, our goal is to get rid of them.  We don't want those DEAD leaves cluttering our lawns and gutters.  Just like the leaves, Jesus got rid of our sins.  During the three days between Jesus' death on the cross and His resurrection, Jesus was in a place that we will never have to go - the lower parts of the Earth. What did Jesus accomplish there?  He took our sins far, far away and left them in the darkness - never to be returned to us.  Ephesians 4:8-10 says, "When He (Jesus) ascended on high, He led captive a host of captives, and He gave gifts to men.  Now, this expression, He ASCENDED what does it mean except that He also had descended into the lower parts of the Earth?"  These scriptures teach us that Jesus freed those men of God from the Old Testament (Abraham, Noah, Jacob and many more). These men had righteousness "on credit" and after Jesus' death on the cross, He freed them from the lower parts of the Earth (those were the captives referenced in these scriptures) AND Jesus left our sins there - in the lower parts of earth - as far as the east is from the west.  

So...when you have those days, when the enemy wants to remind you of the sins of your past. Please think about those leaves of fall that you raked up and threw away. That's exactly what Jesus did for your sins (if you have faith in what He accomplished). He took your sins away - FOREVER and does not want you to be reminded of them anymore. Thank you, Jesus!  

Now...back to those seasons.... :) 

Just like it takes some time for the dead of winter to change to the life of spring - it also takes some time for us to bloom and produce evidence of Jesus in us. After we are born again, we begin to put the Word of God in us, to ask Jesus to baptize us with the Holy Spirit, to pray in the Holy Spirit, to spend time with Jesus daily and as a result, our blooms (our characteristics of Jesus become evident) and in a beautiful way.   

As we "bloom" in Jesus, it’s so very important to build our confidence by understanding WHO we are IN God…we are not Adam…we are Jesus.  We are not flesh, we are SPIRIT. We are not sick, we are WHOLE. We are not guilty, we are FORGIVEN. We are not slaves, we are SONS/DAUGHTERS. All because of…..Jesus! 

NOW, when I see the colors of spring - all the different types of blooms and new life around me....I begin to think about all the fruits of Jesus' Spirit that I now identify with. 

The leaves of.... guilt, sickness, fear, sinner, slave, anger, bondage, selfish, doubt, powerless, perish ...have died....and now the beautiful, fragrant, colorful blooms of spring....forgiveness, whole, peace, righteous, daughter/son, patience, love, freedom, selfLESS, powerFUL, confidence, eternal....are my new identity. 

So, as I often do, I challenge you....during this beautiful season that I know that God designed for such reasons as He has shown me, I challenge you to see Jesus in the new life of Spring. I challenge you to identify with Him.  And....here's a hard one (especially for my generation), instead of talking to your kids about the Easter bunny and egg hunts....tell them about the new life that spring represents.  Read God's Word about the new life they have when they accept Jesus as their savior.  Tell them how Jesus took their place on that cross and how He took their sins away forever - permanently.  Easter is NOT about bunnies, eggs, and candy - but it's about the hope that we have in our only way to God the Father - through His precious Son, Jesus.  Oh, thank you, Jesus, for my new life. I identify with you!  

Part II of another celebration (and glory to God) that spring always brings for our family coming soon! :) Stay tuned...

Everything to Me

Those of you who read my blog often know that I often quote songs....God uses music to speak to me. Which...considering my absolutely NO MUSIC ability self, this is amazing.  I'm not a good singer and I do not play an instrument but I still love music....IF it's keeping my mind on the things of Jesus.  I listen to music in my car, at work, in the shower, at home when the kids and I are playing - every chance I get, I turn on what I call my "Jesus music." Well, not too long ago, I recalled the song by Avalon called "Everything to Me."  I remember hearing this song when I was a child but I had not heard it in a long time....the last time I heard it, I think my relationship with a church might have been everything to me but not my relationship with Jesus.  As a friend and I were talking about how much Jesus meant to us and how He was our hope everyday, she mentioned that song and I had to go listen to it. I played the song....heard just this first verse....and melted....

This song is so true!!! For so many years, Jesus was some distant person that I read about in a book...He wasn't real to me and I'm so very thankful that now, He's much more than history...He's my TODAY and TOMORROW. 

One Wednesday night a month, I have the absolute blessing of teaching and sharing God's Word with a room full of precious ladies - ranging from my age to retirement age.  The way that God has pieced us all together is amazing - our Wednesday bible study is not the picture that I every imagined but it's perfect because God CREATED it.  The details of life are always so much better when we let God have His Way.  :)  

Before each of these Wednesday night meetings, Landis takes the kids to my mother-in-laws house, usually about 45 minutes before all the ladies get here. I cherish this time....my house is quiet...it's just me and Jesus....so, I turn on my music....raise my hands to Jesus....sing, and thank Him for all that He has done for me and will do for me. The last two Wednesdays during this personal worship time, Jesus has spoken things to me that I want to share....about a month ago, as Jesus spoke to my heart....I found myself saying out loud, "Thank you Jesus for making Heaven more real to me."  When I said that, I stopped and asked myself, "Does this mean that I'm going to Heaven soon?"  And, the Spirit of Jesus quickly answered me with this, "No, you are not going to Heaven yet but Heaven has come down to you."  And....the tears began....Jesus was showing me that because I have been yoking with Him...because I have been pouring myself into getting to know Him better that I was beginning to reap those benefits of Heaven coming down to this world.  And, Jesus is so right....I am in a place right now where sometimes I am overwhelmed by Heaven's presence around me....everywhere that I go.  

In Luke 17:21, Jesus says, "You won't be able to say, 'Here it is!' or 'It's over there.' For the Kingdom of God is already among you."  I have read this scripture over and over but the other day, it became real to me....I (we, you) can experience Heaven right now when we grab hold of Jesus. I thank you Jesus that you are showing me Heaven!  

And....Jesus continued to speak last night....again, before the ladies arrived, I was standing in my kitchen, hands raised, praising Jesus, singing that song, "You are Everything to Me" and I began to call out these words....

Thank you Jesus....that you are everything to me....you are

-my righteousness with God 

-my friend and constant companion - you are always walking with me 

-my wisdom 

-my provider

-my fixer 

-my peace

-my rest 

-my healer 

and my JOY. 

And...all these things are heaven NOW to me.  

As the words came to me, I wrote them down....I never want to forget what Jesus speaks to my heart, which is one reason I take the time to blog.  Our strength in Jesus comes from testimonies that we have....in our weak moments, we pull strength from the times that we have allowed Jesus to fill us up with His Word and His Spirit...and, oh, how full I AM.  

This morning, I thank Jesus that I don't have to wait on eternal life with Him, I don't have to wait to experience Heaven...I'm experiencing it now....and, friends, you can to....just yoke up with Jesus....and He will show you the Kingdom...that's what He came to do.  

Jesus says, "Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart; and ye shall find rest unto your souls."  (Matthew 11:29)

I have one of those days ahead of me where I will work from 7:30am to 8:00pm...these days only happen a few times a year and so many times I find myself dreading them BUT today, I will not...I appreciate Jesus' timing....He has reminded me that even on days that seem long, where my physical body and mind will be tired, that my Spirit can rest because Heaven is HERE, that I can find JOY in what the purpose of this day is....which is to let Jesus RISE up in me so others can see Him.  So...thank you Jesus for this beautiful day...I thank you that my day will be an amazing one....I thank you for the opportunity to organize the events that are happening in our school today and I thank you that many parents and students will be blessed with their time together this evening.  I thank you Jesus that you are my REST.  Oh, Jesus, I love you and I thank you for loving me.    

Have a blessed day, my friends...and, remember, the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand...go grab it...it's rightfully yours, IN Jesus. :) 

Toddy 

The Missing Puzzle Piece

Today, I ask you to join me as I take you along the sometimes rocky path of a Title I teacher....

As a Title I teacher, my job is directly dependent on funding....if a school doesn't receive the title I funding that is needed, title I positions are cut and there is always a chance that it's me.  

I worked at a Title I school in Thomasville (very close to my home) for 3 years as a reading specialist. I loved my job. I loved the staff. I trusted the leadership that I worked for.  I was looking forward to Luke walking through those doors as a Kindergartener. Matter of fact, Luke even attended a Kindergarten transition day at that school and had his screening there. Luke and I were prepared for a great start right next to our home....but, then, on the last workday of the school year, my principal came to let me know that my position had been cut, that I would no longer be able to teach in the full time reading specialist position at that school. I was heart broken! I felt lost - and my thoughts immediately went to Luke - where will he go to school?  Will we be able to go together like we have always planned?  Like any normal person would do when they have lost their job, I cried....and cried, and cried.  

Matter of fact, I was disappointed in myself later that I cried so much! :)  I had the Word of God in me and I had Jesus' Spirit residing with me, so I asked myself, why are you panicking?  Why are you so upset?  Even my husband reminded me that I needed to get a hold of my "emotions" (which is flesh) and walk in the Spirit so I could focus on what God had planned for the next phase of my life. 

So...I began thinking...yes, Landis was right.  God NEVER closes one door without having another door prepared for us.  Yeah - I know, I know - people say that all the time but how much do we really believe that?  I had to ask myself that - Natasha, do you really believe that God has another door open for you already?  And, I could confidently say, YES - I knew He did. So...I talked to Jesus - I asked Him to overwhelm me with peace, I asked Him to lead me through the open doors, and I asked Him to help me trust Him.  

Throughout the summer, I applied for jobs everywhere - mostly outside the county because early in the summer, the only jobs in the county were too far from home. In my heart, I didn't want to leave Davidson County schools. I've worked in this county for 14 years and love and trust the wonderful people who are apart of it.  And...thank goodness...just like the good Father He is, He knew I loved Davidson County, God knew that I didn't want to leave...so, He opened a door....

In mid July, I was offered a job as a reading specialist at a school only 15 minutes from home, working for a principal that I had worked with before (who I trusted and knew would be good to me).  But...here's the crazy part....I had also applied for a lead teacher position at this same school and I didn't want to back out of this interview. I went on to interview and was offered the lead teacher position at this same school. So...God didn't open one door but He opened two doors and I was able to make a choice.  What a blessing!  Such a blessing!  

After accepting my new position (back in school leadership, which I had taken myself out of years before), I worked hard to get prepared.  I saw my new room, I met some staff, and even attended several summer meetings with the administrative team at the new school.  During this transitional time, I still felt a little lost, I still missed my family from my old school, I still worried about whether Luke would feel comfortable at this school or not...I just wasn't settled on the inside yet.  

I continued to ask God to show me His purpose...to show me why I had to move AGAIN (this was going to be my 6th school in Davidson County - and that's a whole other blog!).  And...to be honest, I didn't hear any answers from God.  I just knew in my Spirit that I had to trust Him. That's what His Word says....Jesus reminds us in Matthew 11:29-30, "Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and YOU WILL FIND REST FOR YOUR SOULS."  

I knew Jesus wanted me to lean on Him for rest but I will be honest...I didn't do that right away.  Matter of fact, throughout the end of the summer and in to the first workdays, I still struggled with this change.  I remember going home after the first required workday and crying - from pure exhaustion.  It's difficult to sit in a big room with 50 new faces knowing that your friends are hugging and greeting each other at the other school.  It feels like you are at someone's else's family reunion....it's tough.  

But...I'm a fighter and Jesus is IN me and I knew He had work to do.  So...as you may have read in my other blogs....I tried to work myself to death to find the purpose in this new school.  I tried to take over and do EVERYTHING without relying on Jesus' strength and because of that, I continued to have a difficult time adjusting during the first nine weeks. 

Now, I should say...Luke on the other hand did fabulous. God was looking after him and blessed him with the perfect teacher for his personality. He loved the new school from day one and is excelling!  I will be forever grateful for God's direction in Luke's path to that perfect chair in that Kindergarten classroom.  

But...now back to me....:( 

After attempting to work myself to death, I finally lost it and cried out to Jesus and was reminded again by Him to REST.  So...in the past few months, I've worked hard to REST...that sounds crazy, doesn't it...you have to work hard to REST...what?!? Let me explain....

When I get ready to become stressed out about something, instead of playing through all the what ifs and worries in my mind, I STOP, talk to Jesus, turn it over to Him, and then I continue to move forward in the task but I trust Jesus to take care of the pieces. I ask Him to help me piece things together. I ask Him to give me wisdom to work smarter - not harder.  I am amazed sometimes at the things that I think of ahead of time that saves me time later.  This isn't because I'm some great time manager or super smart person - it's because Jesus is talking to me - all the time - He's doing my job WITH me and He never fails! Did you hear that?  Jesus never fails! So...maybe I should switch that...I have been choosing to let Jesus lead as I work with Him and that is what is making the difference. 

Since this change in thinking, I have been absolutely amazed at how things have come together at school.  I sit down and plan with my administrative team once a week at my school and we have constant discussions and make strategic plans about how to grow pockets of students and staff. We are always thinking about ways to make our school better for the sake of the students.  Sometimes these discussions bring up areas that we know we need to work on but we also know we can't fix without time and other people cooperating.  So, we do what we can and then we wait....

And....I take it one step further (and I know my school leaders do too)....we pray about each situation.  I ask Jesus to go forth through the Holy Spirit and help us in each situation. I ask Jesus to give everyone wisdom in how they communicate with each other and I ask Jesus to help us treat each other and our students like He would treat us - with love and compassion - and I aim to let Jesus' flow through me in every situation..  

Well, I'm here to tell you that God has answered our prayers.  God is working miracles in our school building. Yesterday, I had the absolute pleasure of sitting with a grade level that has grown tremendously in their team discussions and planning this year. As I sat and watched them work together, my heart filled up with joy and peace....yes, THAT peace that I've been searching for all year.  

You see there are so many awesome things going on in our school - so, so many - but when you see a team GROW...when you know where they started at the beginning of the year and now you see where they are....it's just awesome and I am so very proud of each one of them!  

And...I am so thankful that God is allowing me to be a part of a school where the staff is always aiming to grow....where the staff has welcomed me...and has pulled me into their family.  Yesterday, sitting in that grade level meeting....I felt like part of the family and I was proud to be a part of it! The missing piece of the puzzle that I've been waiting on....IT ARRIVED...I saw it!  :)  

So...I sit here this morning writing this blog for this reason (sorry, it took me so long to get here)....

I know that sometimes when one door closes in our lives, we don't know where to turn and we wonder what God has planned for us.  I also know from this experience that it doesn't matter how "close" you are to God...how much you read your Bible...how much you spend time in prayer....you will still face these types of situations in your life.  You will still get shaken. I also know that even if you think you are prepared for the shaking part that you might end up getting more rattled than you thought.  I know I did. 

But, I also learned this...when you get shaken, when you don't understand, when you can't see your purpose....dig deeper into God's Word and His Spirit...work hard to REST....by that I mean...work on turning EVERY detail over to Jesus....then, do your part (in the natural world) but also pray (and do your part in the spirit world) and before you know it....everything will fall into place.  You will begin to feel peace...you will begin to see purpose. 

I thank Jesus this morning for placing me at my current school.  I thank Jesus for every staff member there that has laughed with me, cried with me, helped me, hugged me, and put up with me.  :)  It took several months, but I can now SEE my purpose in that building and I have such a PEACE.  

I think of the words in this song by Casting Crowns....

"Just Be Held" 

Hold it all together
Everybody needs you strong
But life hits you out of nowhere
And barely leaves you holding on

And when you're tired of fighting
Chained by your control
There's freedom in surrender
Lay it down and let it go

So when you're on your knees and answers seem so far away
You're not alone, stop holding on and just be held
Your worlds not falling apart, its falling into place
I'm on the throne, stop holding on and just be held
Just be held, just be held

If your eyes are on the storm
You'll wonder if I love you still
But if your eyes are on the cross
You'll know I always have and I always will

And not a tear is wasted
In time, you'll understand
I'm painting beauty with the ashes
Your life is in My hands

Lift your hands, lift your eyes
In the storm is where you'll find Me
And where you are, I'll hold your heart
I'll hold your heart
Come to Me, find your rest
In the arms of the God who wont let go

Friend....when it appears that your world is falling apart....just remember, its really just falling into place.  Not a tear is wasted - God is working on His Plan for YOU - join with Him and then REST.  

Love, 

Toddy