Like A Child - REST

Merry Christmas!!!  It's been 10 months since I blogged and I sure do miss it. I'm always hesitant to blog because I never want my posts to be self-centered and bring attention to me. I have asked the Lord to help me use this blog as a testimony to Jesus and His power and manifestation in our lives.

Obviously, we are in the middle of the Christmas season - my favorite time of the year!  I have always loved Christmas but the meaning of Christmas and it's "specialness" to me has changed through the years.  I used to get excited about Christmas because I was looking forward to getting that long awaited gift, or I looked forward to Christmas because I enjoyed decorating my house and reading Christmas novels.  When I had children, Christmas was exciting because I looked forward to decorating with them, participating in all the Christmas activities, and then, of course, watching their excitement as they opened their presents on Christmas morning.  All of these things are still a lot of fun but the meaning of Christmas is no longer these "things" to me...Christmas has become about a "person" to me and His name is Jesus.

You see three years ago, the enemy attacked me with extreme anxiety and suffocating fear.  For about 2 years, I walked around my daily life in dread of something bad happening to me, my family, or this country.  It's difficult to describe what was going on in my mind.  I remember sitting on my back porch one beautiful Sunday morning, watching Luke playing in the leaves in our backyard - it was a moment that I should have cherished because life was so good - I was so blessed but...I remember sitting there thinking about how the world could end tomorrow...I remember begging God not to let something hurt my baby boy. I didn't know then but I know now...the devil had infiltrated my mind with fear and it had to be replaced.  This feeling of fear seemed to peek around Thanksgiving time and as the Christmas season picked up, I felt more and more sad and dreadful.  No one around me knew it...I hid it well and even turned to alcohol to cover it up.

By the time the week of Christmas got here, I was miserable...my mind was racing 100 miles an hour all the time and it was not racing on the good things.  I thank Jesus that I had been continuing to go to Church during this dark time - I was hearing God's Word and I was studying God's Word on my own. I was doing all that I knew to do and I was still struggling with fear.  My pastor had been teaching on the importance of being filled with the Holy Spirit and he had taught us the difference in being saved and the filling of the Holy Spirit.  I knew that I wasn't filled with the Holy Spirit but I was scared of what would happen if I asked Jesus to baptize me in Him. Then, the Sunday before Christmas, my pastor, through the power of the Holy Spirit, led an amazing service - none like I have seen or been a part of before.  He began the service by reading from the Bible and then he stopped and told us that he could feel the presence of the Holy Spirit on Him and in that place.  He reminded us that the first Christmas was full of JOY and PEACE - both of which I was NOT experiencing in my life at the time.  He then told us that Jesus wanted to release JOY and PEACE in that room on that day and he invited us to come and be prayed for.  One by one people came to him, he laid their hands on them, and JOY and PEACE filled their bodies.  Some people laughed out loud, some people cried happy tears, some people began dancing, and some people sang.  I could feel the joy in the room and it was unbelievable!  There was something in my body and in my mind that knew I just had to go experience this JOY for myself!  

During the service before this one, I requested prayer from a friend who prayed for me (with her hands upon me) that Jesus fill me with the Holy Spirit.  I didn't realize at that moment that her prayer was answered but on this joyous Sunday before Christmas, my prayer was confirmed with signs.  As I felt the energy and abundance of peace and joy fill our sanctuary, I stepped out into the aisle and walked to my preacher.  I remember saying..."I don't want to miss this experience....and I need to be filled..."  My pastor laid his hands on me and prayed with me and it's hard to put into words what happened...I could feel every ounce of fear, anxiety, dread, and misery leave my body and be replaced with an overwhelming amount of joy, peace, wholeness, happiness, all the good thoughts and feelings that I had longed for...this could only happen through the power of the Holy Spirit taking over my flesh and making me WHOLE in my MIND and in my body.  The devil had no room anywhere in my body anymore.  PRAISE JESUS!

That Christmas - the Christmas of 2012 was the most amazing Christmas I've ever had.  I was happy, joyful, and at peace. God continued to confirm my baptism in the Holy Spirit as I began praying in tongues and as I received revelation from His Word that I never had before.  The fear was gone and Jesus was home!!!

So...now, today, this year and every year, Christmas means Jesus to me - it means JOY, it means PEACE, it means sharing what Jesus has done in my life with others.  Because we wanted Christmas to be focused on Jesus, our family made some changes....we talked to Luke about the truth of Santa  Claus and we have made an effort not to keep ourselves so BUSY during the Christmas season. We read Luke and Kate the story of Jesus' birth straight from the Bible (not a children's book) and we take every chance we get to talk with them about how the Christmas "stuff" that we see is related to Jesus (example: we put lights on the tree because Jesus is the light of our world.)  I'm not saying that we are perfect and that we do everything right - but we do make the effort to keep Christmas focused on Jesus - the REAL reason for this season.  It is so sad that this season is commercialized so much and that children can tell you all about the "realness" of Santa and know so much about him but, in reality, he is a lie but most children don't know Jesus. Oh, Jesus, help us to get refocused on you!

One way that I celebrate Jesus during every Christmas season is I take the time to jot down all the ways that I've seen Jesus manifest in my life throughout the year. As I add and add to the list, I am reminded of how I can't live without Jesus and I become overwhelmingly thankful for that first Christmas night.

I'm not going to share all these testimonies on this blog today but I do want to tell you about one....

You know I just wrote about how I was filled with the Holy Spirit years ago and how now He is able to take control of my flesh when I allow Him and sometimes when I don't expect Him, which is so comforting.  Well...a few weeks ago, I experienced one of those miraculous moments. Hang with me as I share....

This year, I took on a new job as a lead teacher at a different school. So, I started a NEW position at another different school - this is the 6th time that I've changed schools in my career. This job also meant that I would once again be leading a group of educators - which I love but had stepped away from because it was taking time away from my family.

Well, I guess God wanted me back in school leadership because He removed me from my other job and placed me in this one.  I knew I had to trust Him and do all that I could to fulfill His will with a positive attitude and diligence.  The first three months of school I worked myself crazy - I have been working on the weekends, doing work as early as 4:00am, staying later in the afternoons than I would like - I was tired!!! Just plain tired!!!

So...one morning, I threw MY hands up, literally, and I told Jesus....I can't do this anymore!!! I'm tired - I need help!!!  What happened next was a miracle....my body melted, I closed my eyes, and just cried out to Jesus and I began to feel my body rock (like someone was holding me in a rocking chair)....it was amazing!!!  I felt peace overwhelm me - that same peace that I felt on that Christmas 3 years ago. I cried happy tears, I praised Jesus and in the midst of my praise, I heard the words of one of my favorite songs...

I'm coming to this place
Tired and far away
I'm longing for some peace
To help me through this day
So here's my life Lord, here's my plea

I want to see your face
Feel your warm embrace
And lay here like a child
In your loving arms
Where I'm safe from harm
And the sorrow fades away

There's healing in your name
So I cry out to you
Forgiveness is your way
Won't you see my through
So here's my life Lord, here's my plea

I want to see your face
Feel your warm embrace
And lay here like a child
In your loving arms
Where I'm safe from harm

 Crystal Lewis - Like A Child Lyrics | MetroLyrics 

At that moment, I knew exactly what Jesus was telling me...He was reminding me to REST...like a child lying in His Father's arms....just rest....

So...I did...I rested in the arms of Jesus as He rocked me...and as He rocked me, my mind was once again filled with the right things....Jesus began setting my priorities straight....He lovingly took away my stress and replaced it with trust!! He reminded me to take one day at a time....to put Him first and the rest would fall into place.  And, you know what?  I've made an effort to thank Jesus for His rest every morning...I've put work to the side as much as possible outside of school and trusted the Lord that I would get it done during the school day. And, amazingly, I walked out the door on Friday with just a small, few things to take care of this weekend.  Thank you Jesus!  We serve a God who cares about every detail of our lives - every single one!!! :)   Don't forget that during the hustle and bustle of this Christmas season....

I write all of this today for several reasons....
(1) to encourage you to REST during this Christmas season....take some time to sit down with your family, read the Christmas story straight from the Bible and then talk as a family about how you have seen Jesus manifest in your lives this year
(2) put JESUS first....not work, not shopping....just sit by your tree, look at those beautiful LIGHTS, and praise Him...for without Jesus, there would be no LIGHT, no hope...there would be no JOY and no PEACE
(3) to remind you of the importance of being filled with the Holy Spirit...if you have asked Jesus to become one with your Spirit and you have accepted Him as your savior but you have never asked Jesus to baptize you with the Holy Spirit, I invite you to take that step

"For to us a Child is born, to us a Son is given: and the government shall be upon His shoulder, and His name shall be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, and Prince of Peace." Isaiah 9:6

Jesus is no longer in that manger....He is ALIVE and ACTIVE in Earth today...I pray that He becomes a friend, a deliverer, and a healer to you PERSONALLY today!

Merry Christmas friends!!!

Love,
Toddy

The Flu - Taken to the Cross

In the last few days, I have been reading and rereading and reading again Hebrews - Chapter 11.  It's a familiar chapter to many people - it's the chapter of the Bible that focuses on faith and is where God reminds us of the unshakeable faith of the saints from the Old Testament (our forefathers).

Hebrews 11:1-2 says, "Now FAITH is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. For by FAITH, the elders obtained a good report."

The amplified Bible describes faith as a simple confidence and trust in God.  So many times I find myself trying to make faith in God and what He CAN and WILL do so hard. I find myself looking for "signs" or "signals" about what He wants me to do or what I should do when I get in situations. I find myself using my OWN fleshly mind to try to figure them out instead of doing the only thing God expects me to do - TRUST - remind Him of His Word and then TRUST that through His Son, Jesus, who is IN me, His Word will come to pass - everytime!  So, this past week, through my precious daughter, Kate, God reminded me that FAITH isn't about trusting in what you CAN see but trusting in what you CAN'T see - knowing that the rescue/deliverance/good report is coming - whether the circumstances show it right away or not.  

Let me tell you about sweet baby Kate's testimony this week....

Kate had a sudden onset of a fever on Friday morning. She was fine one minute and had a 102 fever the next.  Landis and I began praying for her healing but the enemy remained persistent.  On Saturday morning, her fever continued to rise and reached 103 at one point.  So, we decided to take her to the doctor. I thought she probably had an ear infection so on the way to the doctor, I continued to pray that Jesus would clear her ears and take away her fever. When we arrived at the doctor, the nurse did a flu test. This kind of surprised me because I did not think she would have the flu - no one in our house had been sick!  

But...then, the doctor came in and checked her ears, throat, and lungs. Her ears were clear, her lungs sounded great, and her throat was fine - praise Jesus! Matter of fact the doctor was surprised that she didn't have a cough because she went on to explain that Kate had a type A flu.   The doctor said Kate could run a fever for 5 to 7 days and gave us the option of using Tamiflu to possibly lessen the fever.  This diagnosis angered me.  This "flu" was sent by the enemy to attack Kate and then to create fear in our family for the possibility of the rest of us getting it.  I was having no part of agreeing with the enemy on any of that - I left the doctor saying out loud - "What flu?"  This baby girl is just fine! 

In the car, on the way home, I got angry with the enemy and my anger gave me the boldness to cry out with confidence to Jesus.  Landis and I together agreed not to give kate tamiflu but to give Jesus full control - to let Him to heal her of her fever.  Through the power of Jesus in us, we took authority over the sickness and took back any ground the enemy thought he gained. We knew that Kate's healing was already done, now, we just had to trust and allow the circumstances to catch up with God's spoken words.  

Kate continued to run a fever on Saturday night but on Sunday, her fever began to subside. She required no Tylenol or advil on Sunday. She began to play again, talk again, and to enjoy herself. The sickness (the 5 to 7 day fever) was gone in less than one day - with no medicine!!! The fear of a flu being spread around our house did not exist. "What flu???" We claimed! Jesus took that flu to the cross so it wasn't going to plague this house. Ohh, what a powerful God we serve!!! 

You see that's the difference in our God and savior, Jesus, compared to the gods of other religions. Our God - the Father of Abraham, Isaac, Jacob and Jesus - He shows up with power, a power that we can see manifest here on Earth - only the God with the big G can do that! And...to see His power, all that He requires of us is faith and trust in WHO He is and WHAT He has already done for us! 

You see - just because a doctor says we have something or labels a sickness doesn't mean we have to succumb to the symptoms that come with that "diagnosis." Matter of fact, we should ignore what symptoms THEY (the doctors) say could come and focus only on what God says which is that Jesus already took this sickness to the cross. 

1 Peter 2:24 says, "Jesus Himself bore our sins in His body on the cross, so that we might die to sin and live to righteousness; for by HIS WOUNDS, WE ARE HEALED."  You see - Jesus took our sicknesses to the cross with our sins.  We should not take them back when the enemy hurls them at us.  Instead - don't claim the sickness, rebuke it in the name and authority of Jesus Christ, our savior from sin and sickness. Remind any symptoms that come of God's Word - speak them out loud and watch the sickness flee. 

Today (one week later), I sit in my chair, healthy, blessed, and happy, and, most importantly - I sit here WELL!  Baby Kate is WELL - Luke is WELL - and Landis is WELL!  Through the authority that Jesus gave us here on Earth, this family cast the flu out of Kate's body and we forbid it to attack any other bodies in this house. We reminded God of His Word and His promises and, as He always does, He looked over them.  We had faith (simple confidence and trust) in the Heavenly Father through his precious son, Jesus and, even though the circumstances didn't look like a good report at first - the healing came - as it always does when we give Jesus the full control and authority that He has already won. 

I KNOW in whom I believe! I KNOW who has authority in this house over all of our bodies and His name is Jesus! And, I'm so grateful! 

Friends - Jesus is a healer - of everything - from small irritating colds to life threatening diseases. He's the deliverer of the person who goes to church every Sunday but still struggles with suffocating fear.  He's the redeemer of the man sitting in prison for past mistakes who is repenting and turning his life over to God.  (I've been a witness to each one of those examples and there are so many, many more.)  Jesus loves you - trust Him, have faith in Him, get to KNOW Him and good reports and awesome testimonies - they will come!  

Toddy  

Miracles

Sitting in a teacher meeting on Friday, several teachers and I were talking about how to help our students grow academically. After the middle of the year reading assessments, some of them did not perform as well as we had hoped. As the reading specialist, it is my job to work with students that are having a difficult time in reading. The list of students who needed help had grown since the beginning of the year, so the grade level teachers and I began developing a plan of the students who would attend my reading groups each day.  My list grew quite large and definitely set me up for a challenge ahead.  Somewhere in the conversation, I flippantly made the comment, “I can’t work miracles but I will do the best I can.”  And, I truly meant that, yes, I would do the best I could to help these students and to grow them in reading.  That part of the comment was positive but….the more I reflected on the first part of the statement about not being able to work miracles, the more upset I became with myself.  Why would I say that? Miracles are possible and I can make miracles happen.  And, this is how I know….

In the school setting, as teachers, we perform miracles everyday. To the child who went home the night before to a cold house, barely ate dinner, got himself dressed the next morning, and then with little enthusiasm or energy loaded the bus for school the next day, the teacher who greets that child with a smile and a hug and a simple statement of “Good morning, it’s good to see you,” THAT greeting that warmed that child’s heart was a miracle to him. 

To the Kindergartener who enters the school doors for the first time and can barely talk, doesn’t know the alphabet exists, and barely knows how to interact with other students and adults and then leaves for summer in June holding books that he can READ, the team of teachers that taught that child how to read performed a miracle.  Those teachers provided that student with a hope – being able to READ opens so many doors for him.

To the third, fourth, or fifth grader who has struggled to understand what is being taught in math and is getting ready to give up and then her teacher offers to spend extra one on one time with her afterschool or first thing in the morning. Then, finally, she understands and is so proud of herself for sticking with it – that is a miracle to her. 

You see?? Everyday in our school settings, we work miracles.  Students who enter our doors with no hope, no energy, no motivation, and many times, no positive interactions with adults, they go out of our doors everyday having been lifted up, loved on, encouraged, challenged, and reminded that THEY ARE SOMEBODY IMPORTANT and that THEY CAN LEARN. That’s a miracle.

So, for me to say, “I can’t work miracles” here at school. That’s a lie.  I CAN work miracles with the students I serve. I already have worked miracles daily.  I provide the students with a smiling face who is ready to read with them daily.  I take the time to plan instruction that I know will benefit them – in small, individual ways.  When I see the students get frustrated, I remind them of their strengths, I remind them of the growth that I have seen in them as readers and as thinkers.  I talk to them about their lives, I hug them, and yes, I tell them that I love them. Most importantly, I try my best to give these students MY BEST everyday and that’s a miracle. 

And, now, to a bigger setting…as I reflected and repented on my flippant, untrue, negative statement, I was reminded of this scripture, “There is one who speaks rashly like the thrusts of a sword. But the tongue of the wise brings healing” (Proverbs 12:18). In that teacher meeting, I spoke rashly (without thinking first). I let words fly out of my mouth without taking the time to reflect on what I was really saying and I have talked to Jesus about that. I’ve apologized to Him and He has cast that sin into the depths of the sea.

I repented for lying to myself and to others because when I said, “I can’t work miracles,” I told a lie.  Because, you know what??? I can work miracles just as Jesus did.  Jesus CAN and WILL work miracles through me and I KNOW that in my heart so I am ashamed that I spoke against what God’s Word teaches me.  I’m so thankful that I have a savior who took my sins to the cross and left them there and my flippant words are now nailed to that cross and, after this blog, I will dwell on them no longer. 

But, for now, let me set myself straight and remind myself again that I am a miracle worker.  In John 14:12, Jesus says, “Most assuredly, I say to you, he who believes in Me, the works that I do he will do also; and greater works than these he will do, because I go to my Father.” When Jesus walked this Earth, he healed the sick, he forgave sins, he set people free of the guilt that was burdening them, and he set them free from the captivity of the Devil.  Now, because Jesus lives in me and I am filled with the power of the Holy Spirit, I can allow Jesus to continue His miracles through me. I will continue to pray daily that Jesus rise up in me when the opportunities to do His Works come forth - that I may speak according to His Word and heal and deliver those around me. 

So, let me conclude by changing that terrible statement that came out of my mouth on Friday. I change my declaration – I will no longer say, “I can’t work miracles.” But, I will say, “YES, I CAN and WILL work miracles.” 

Thank you, Holy Spirit, for your correction and guidance. Thank you Jesus for loving me enough to get me back on course in my thinking and in my speaking. What a beautiful savior we serve!  

And…to all my teacher friends….thank YOU for working miracles daily for the students that enter our classroom doors.  I love each of you!